Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The one and only - Arno (present tense)

Well, Arno seems to be the subject of many a post. He is usually cute and sweet, but these exam times have stretched our relationship and my patience to the very limit.

He doesn't sit for 5 minutes to study. Yesterday, I caught him sneaking around outside, so I sent him back to his room to study. A few minutes later I went to check up on him (thank goodness), and found him hanging out the window - "to get fresh air, mom".

I think the final straw was when I discovered "we" have been learning (and I say "we" - because I have also actively been learning his work - don't you know!), according to Marielle's time table. WHY? Well, because mister has lost his - so he thought it a good idea to learn according to what his sister is writing. What is the problem with that, mom?

I sat for a full minute with my head on my arms at the dinner table last night, trying hard to process this information. Finally, I prayed, Lord, please don't give me strength - I might just misuse that, just give me endurance....

Well now, here is the dilemma. He wrote Maths the day before yesterday. Maths is his best subject. We had taken worksheets from the Internet, and practiced until he finally said - why do you keep giving me stuff I know how to do?

Maths teacher, is also his guitar teacher, so with "insider trading information", she told us he got a mere, terrible 45%. WHY? Well, because he was not concentrating, and so he did not read the vital instruction which said: show ALL you workings out on the exam paper.

He just wrote down the answers. Now, BEFORE you are tempted into thinking that this is a very harsh lesson for a little, cute boy to have to learn, let me put this in perspective. If he had shown his working out, he would have got 60%. Still not a good mark for his Maths. It turns out, just as badly as he read the beginning of the paper, just as badly did he continue. He misread the questions throughout - costing him precious marks.

Here is the reason for my story. The Professor - who himself is an A student, and perfectionist beyond perfectionists, heard of Arno's mark. He got on his high horse and wrote the principle an email demanding answers, and saying that this is highly unfair - when Arno has met the criteria.

I was then forced to write my own email, stating that I felt very strongly that Arno's marks remain the same. Arno needs to learn the consequences of his bad learning style, as well as his lack-sa-daisy attitude to reading the questions. He needs to learn those lessons NOW - rather than later. He must also not get the idea that when things go badly, his dad will bail him out. Imagine he misreads his Matric  Exams (do I think he will ever REACH matric???) , then what? The Professor will phone the moderator and say: hey - my son actually is just a bit misguided, I insist that you adjust his marks so that he passes? I somehow don't think so...

Well, would love your opinion, words of wisdom, advice - whatever! Did I do right? Arno by the way - will still get a good mark for his maths - because he had a high term mark.

3 comments:

  1. I hear everybody complain about their sons about the same thing! School is just a bore to them. I think you have handled it correctly.
    But I can just imagine the school principal receiving both these opposite messages from both of the parents!
    Good luck to you! And good luck to the principal! LOL

    ReplyDelete
  2. I agree with how you handled it. Rather learn from mistakes sooner than later when it's not so easy to rectify it anymore.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yes, my thoughts too. I spent many years "rescuing" the Prof - of course in a different sense, but rescuing someone is never a good thing. If a child is repeatedly rescued - he never gets to feel the consequences of anything. No consequences leads to children with no conscience - because they can get away with everything. I think this is a situation a bit like "tough love". Hope it works. Will keep you posted! This growing up kids is a hard business!

    ReplyDelete